honey, im home(:

bangkok was tiring and dangerous. but the shopping is nice i guess. but it was mentally and physically exhausting. i think i need therapy. or at least someone to rant too, but deniisha and emelia are not home. or id take a cup of coffee. maybe two. i feel so useless. disposable. not needed. you know. i may not seem like someone who needs people to assure her verbally that they need her or they love her. but god. im not what i seem like. i dont know why im saying all these. maybe its the sleepless nights. maybe its the pain. maybe its the coffee. maybe im going insane. all the shopping. well hell. if i knew what was wrong i wouldnt be typing this. i would be fixing the damn problem. i know im babbling and i hate it when i babble. but its been 4 days away from talking like myself and im desperate. you know life sucks when your family doesnt know you and doesnt like you being you.